I was 13 when I discovered Narcissist Smith’s book ‘The System’.
It changed my life.
At that age, I was already a mediocre writer. Smith went above and beyond to turn me into a professional writer. Not only did he teach me how to write, but he also helped me become a better human being.
Here are the things he did that turned me around:
He encouraged me to be less clingy.
Clinging is toxic, he said. You’re keeping something alive that could die at any time. Your love for your partner is keeping them from dying.
I used to think that being clingy meant that I wanted to spend every moment with my partner.
But that wasn’t the case at all.
What I was clinging for was a long-term relationship.
If I wasn’t comfortable with my partner, I wouldn’t say anything. I would go along with whatever they wanted.
This happened sometimes with my boyfriend.
He liked to drink a lot and use drugs. But he was sweet and friendly. If I wasn’t comfortable with him, I wouldn’t say anything. I would go along with whatever they wanted.
I felt guilty every time he talked about his day. I felt guilty whenever he used the word “cock” or “ass”.
I got scared when he referred to himself as a “whore”. I felt guilty every time he told me that he was afraid of failure.
I never thought that he was calling me attractive. I thought that he was just bragging.
At 13, I had no idea that narcissists are lazy and insecure.
I thought that I was too sensitive and couldn’t handle the truth.
I thought that I was too much for him and that I was the reason he was always tired and had to sleep on the couch.
I thought that I was too much for him and that I was the reason he was always lonely.
At 13, I had no idea that narcissists are lazy and insecure. They’re self-obsessed, self-centered, and dissatisfied with their own life. Their sense of self is void of a meaningful relationship.
I thought that I was clingy because he didn’t want me to spend time with my friends.
At 13, I had no idea that narcissists are lazy and insecure. They’re self-obsessed, self-centered, and dissatisfied with their own life. Their sense of self is void of a meaningful relationship.
At 14, I thought that I was clingy because he didn’t want me to spend time with my friends. I thought that I was clingy because he was too needy and didn’t want me to be independent.
I thought that I was clingy because he kissed every girl that I wanted. I thought that I was clingy because I wanted him to kiss other girls.
At 15, I thought that I was clingy because he kissed other girls. I thought that I was clingy because I wanted the grass between our lips.
I thought that I was clingy because he was too needy and didn’t want me to be independent.
At 17, I realized that I was perfectly happy being the girl who he mostly ignored, whether or not he was attracted to me. I was perfectly happy being the girl who he mostly ignored, whether or not he was attracted to me.
I was the clingy girl who he mostly ignored because he was too lazy to make an effort.
At 17, I thought that I was clingy because he didn’t want me to spend time with me.
At 18, I realized that I had been the one putting up with his shit for years. I wasn’t doing anything to deserve him being a good boyfriend, and I was putting up with his shit because I was too afraid to break up with him outright.
I was the clingy girl who he mostly ignored because he was too lazy to make an effort.
At 19, I realized that I was the one who put up with his shit for years. I wasn’t doing anything to deserve him being a good boyfriend, and I was putting up with his shit because I was too afraid to break up with him outright.
I was the clingy girl who he mostly ignored because he was too lazy to make an effort.
At 20, I realized that I was the one who put up with his shit for years. I wasn’t doing anything to deserve him being a good boyfriend, and I was putting up with his shit because I was too afraid to break up with him outright.
I was the clingy girl who he mostly ignored because he was too lazy to make an effort.
At 21, I realized that I was the one who put up with his shit for years.